{"title":"Leave me alone.","description":null,"products":[{"product_id":"dont-ask-me-anything","title":"Don't ask me anything.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-e70c57fc-7fff-75ce-fe3e-193d42fb3ebf\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 11pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: bold; font-variant: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eDon't ask me anything.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe will still tell you.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50054009028856,"sku":"12602497098748370443","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50054009061624,"sku":"87324367426134152615","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50054009094392,"sku":"30727572336139393156","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50054009127160,"sku":"21459135587205630786","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50054009159928,"sku":"11830885448853361750","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50054009192696,"sku":"23666534737140672387","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50054009225464,"sku":"18083551542700112233","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50054009258232,"sku":"16133999726139952277","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50054009291000,"sku":"10702297352975627248","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50054009323768,"sku":"30008739985582451169","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50054009356536,"sku":"17838529593491885568","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50054009389304,"sku":"17340083394144740567","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50054009422072,"sku":"74779015876975612451","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50054009454840,"sku":"72153595414629156550","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50054009487608,"sku":"10440779503827866120","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50054009520376,"sku":"86723892307818717854","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50054009553144,"sku":"20584815742825889150","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50054009585912,"sku":"10108404386599703771","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50054009618680,"sku":"11864330636213730304","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50054009651448,"sku":"20481791052046476078","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50054009684216,"sku":"20708679862123695256","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/755477353030232137_2048.jpg?v=1786867547"},{"product_id":"how-are-you-dont","title":"How are you? Don't.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-9162f919-7fff-863b-fc3a-e67200c7d13a\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 11pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: bold; font-variant: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eHow are you? Don't.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIt was never really a question.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50054276088056,"sku":"80574559756971571645","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50054276120824,"sku":"58540434847191233818","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50054276153592,"sku":"23616145470278800479","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50054276186360,"sku":"44910174085128027840","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50054276219128,"sku":"20583159652541845206","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50054276251896,"sku":"19419342487679693993","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50054276284664,"sku":"49509197248791840258","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50054276317432,"sku":"25778905457345488073","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50054276350200,"sku":"20154039653743341117","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50054276382968,"sku":"20982950318246430909","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50054276415736,"sku":"23464772193509609637","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50054276448504,"sku":"54713350640779134111","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50054276481272,"sku":"10198229702669969655","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50054276514040,"sku":"11250684376321783613","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50054276546808,"sku":"85498666547020277967","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50054276579576,"sku":"27042762787861660987","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50054276612344,"sku":"20437899500995197596","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50054276645112,"sku":"29692454338838494571","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50054276677880,"sku":"14348960623690196845","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50054276710648,"sku":"20149282067973346044","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50054276743416,"sku":"32239993255100195313","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/200467639600017248_2048.jpg?v=1786867910"},{"product_id":"triggered-but-polite","title":"Triggered, but polite.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-fc9524c1-7fff-8f63-cce7-2f9535d101e3\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 11pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: bold; font-variant: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eTriggered, but polite.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe will address it calmly, later, never.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50060554469624,"sku":"53191028656120383855","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50060554502392,"sku":"16874253530127104657","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50060554535160,"sku":"23254751838760152385","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50060554567928,"sku":"64465151611803298200","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50060554600696,"sku":"40754712636765444243","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50060554633464,"sku":"31489661886948912668","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50060554666232,"sku":"32167151851691254781","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50060554699000,"sku":"59621884689903392658","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50060554731768,"sku":"19205445783927697342","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50060554764536,"sku":"14618000720094937780","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50060554797304,"sku":"38926465487670127891","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50060554830072,"sku":"30491496957147597805","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50060554862840,"sku":"10878071298546774291","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50060554895608,"sku":"31182741324858799615","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50060554928376,"sku":"19275316897588861233","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50060554961144,"sku":"29072251693433751024","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50060554993912,"sku":"17184279120313989368","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50060555026680,"sku":"17743611965131649085","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50060555059448,"sku":"16028410635087245351","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50060555092216,"sku":"20942269700286777228","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50060555124984,"sku":"22930470779310216336","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/9345545465448038920_2048.jpg?v=1786869229"},{"product_id":"i-read-the-room-and-stayed","title":"I read the room and stayed.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt;\"\u003esays \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 14.6667px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eI read the room and stayed.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eOn purpose. Every time.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50060556337400,"sku":"32193045064560077985","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50060556370168,"sku":"16120849046765563486","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50060556402936,"sku":"17205686625910190491","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50060556435704,"sku":"29781702297952580155","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50060556468472,"sku":"74599773974377855510","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50060556501240,"sku":"11382726962434008844","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50060556534008,"sku":"11832167013273410227","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50060556566776,"sku":"19943031908279879797","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50060556599544,"sku":"98217938518432399581","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50060556632312,"sku":"29014494697659828518","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50060556665080,"sku":"31383341494449165374","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50060556697848,"sku":"93968952650869004405","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50060556730616,"sku":"65505377834429930122","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50060556763384,"sku":"89814978698466071208","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50060556796152,"sku":"21837839056486372999","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50060556828920,"sku":"69212000632337279044","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50060556861688,"sku":"96725676234805934558","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50060556894456,"sku":"84266738706384178920","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50060556927224,"sku":"72629031326186842508","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50060556959992,"sku":"76614118202280307366","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50060556992760,"sku":"27245825033600320652","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/4181141472771163881_2048.jpg?v=1786869563"},{"product_id":"im-fine","title":"i'm fine.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto, sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e i'm fine.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe is not. He has decided this is fine.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-48acf573-7fff-8a5c-cce6-42d7b3e055cf\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d1de14fc-7fff-b1ba-2f37-dfc0809ddb93\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50061006274808,"sku":"31812586364125138908","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50061006307576,"sku":"10660066698207276593","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50061006340344,"sku":"32410233954746597021","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50061006373112,"sku":"14338355518449360256","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50061006405880,"sku":"15423310061330006562","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50061006438648,"sku":"26338035656446986675","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50061006471416,"sku":"25609786119868833977","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50061006504184,"sku":"23957193096913445220","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50061006536952,"sku":"19824737323291979411","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50061006569720,"sku":"19060596497347291520","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50061006602488,"sku":"10487467778537424312","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50061006635256,"sku":"15468173670150529759","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50061006668024,"sku":"18701232935979355905","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50061006700792,"sku":"23369963455056283740","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50061006733560,"sku":"28578884035397714644","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50061006766328,"sku":"62980882481080330478","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50061006799096,"sku":"18396530738911512878","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50061006831864,"sku":"29837914463985204843","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50061006864632,"sku":"10438848001333784768","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50061006897400,"sku":"29759366890002343844","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50061006930168,"sku":"19455137761797297703","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/1005045583095385296_2048.jpg?v=1786869904"},{"product_id":"five-alarms-deep","title":"Five alarms deep.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-96de5eaf-7fff-5874-fcd5-0c78026cf3aa\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 11pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: bold; font-variant: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eFive alarms deep.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eThe first four were optimistic.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50064224649464,"sku":"13851454241197196461","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50064224682232,"sku":"19196315939667397209","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50064224715000,"sku":"27917114508458147391","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50064224747768,"sku":"30976647932875293567","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50064224780536,"sku":"15968149157451724442","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50064224813304,"sku":"24199876786287788959","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50064224846072,"sku":"36079657028216474931","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50064224878840,"sku":"31871041488543686383","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50064224911608,"sku":"31028606682460481899","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50064224944376,"sku":"77082366584938290246","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50064224977144,"sku":"26831005311597102501","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50064225009912,"sku":"22867310754334354539","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064225042680,"sku":"16532457284446601676","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064225075448,"sku":"18808941307026989833","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50064225108216,"sku":"18341033514572058062","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064225140984,"sku":"22731396165397593250","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064225173752,"sku":"19436415080265850439","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50064225206520,"sku":"14390678095469048303","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064225239288,"sku":"27927082082161736709","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064225272056,"sku":"47154768266048766423","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50064225304824,"sku":"96278727234612473884","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/2113281167820353265_2048.jpg?v=1786870371"},{"product_id":"i-replied-in-my-head","title":"I replied in my head.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 11pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eI\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 11pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: bold; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e replied in my head.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-baf21ea0-7fff-4cb0-8df2-62a677ae75f1\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eThe real reply. The good one.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50064286548216,"sku":"88259794773006805916","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50064286580984,"sku":"17983272872357145580","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50064286613752,"sku":"27418193413168642356","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50064286646520,"sku":"29408161420755952585","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50064286679288,"sku":"14273918097957133362","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50064286712056,"sku":"23039145041241664374","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50064286744824,"sku":"98182759105486392116","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50064286777592,"sku":"17502541366534517288","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50064286810360,"sku":"86099560512406990786","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50064286843128,"sku":"15027944263884728765","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50064286875896,"sku":"12972855690285543180","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50064286908664,"sku":"98792444425055411377","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064286941432,"sku":"23415269615113075593","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064286974200,"sku":"29242905682943388267","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50064287006968,"sku":"31077996676551330775","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064287039736,"sku":"28738250924098763107","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064287072504,"sku":"18287630460629388531","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50064287105272,"sku":"33757567139576596800","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064287138040,"sku":"56803338230982925569","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064287170808,"sku":"84619566101144694724","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50064287203576,"sku":"13629280350151582661","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/871335847632636752_2048.jpg?v=1786871288"},{"product_id":"sorry-in-advance","title":"Sorry in advance.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-2c489932-7fff-c4df-c6ed-33c1d668457d\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 11pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-variant: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eSorry in advance.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eFor what, specifically, he will not say.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50064288415992,"sku":"17908518342774478411","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50064288448760,"sku":"27967015761735350090","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50064288481528,"sku":"79823662794518656494","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50064288514296,"sku":"29075399647382120451","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50064288547064,"sku":"32351811459724856887","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50064288579832,"sku":"19987952282739956710","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50064288612600,"sku":"29495205760673255756","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50064288645368,"sku":"26843693732434485815","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50064288678136,"sku":"27269627379563111237","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50064288710904,"sku":"25649816460720153833","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50064288743672,"sku":"89398094177835597949","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50064288776440,"sku":"52210087224709606250","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064288809208,"sku":"80798311896137095882","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064288841976,"sku":"33253295963253349495","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50064288874744,"sku":"17319915268421974579","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064288907512,"sku":"33601213330947277595","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064288940280,"sku":"97836133000618041434","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50064288973048,"sku":"82351980345129683881","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064289005816,"sku":"98172488043725092397","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064289038584,"sku":"21266379792799631680","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50064289071352,"sku":"13700728476187265953","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/4768411246081542507_2048.jpg?v=1786871638"},{"product_id":"i-made-eye-contact-once","title":"I made eye contact once.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: bold; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e I made eye contact once.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIt has not been repeated on purpose.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50064562094328,"sku":"11624156093850699360","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50064562127096,"sku":"91719716938070286132","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50064562159864,"sku":"71499978790626932722","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50064562192632,"sku":"29896203677504229777","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50064562225400,"sku":"23666192860384244276","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50064562258168,"sku":"21125473348607515362","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50064562290936,"sku":"31009666467450915796","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50064562323704,"sku":"12657185616042161926","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50064562356472,"sku":"14043676801941754486","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50064562389240,"sku":"21725244130537801602","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50064562422008,"sku":"16544085627206157460","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50064562454776,"sku":"20877758424630183251","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064562487544,"sku":"57854809296750023232","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064562520312,"sku":"13936853731431320238","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50064562553080,"sku":"16197220922712968965","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064562585848,"sku":"18905488909643921641","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064562618616,"sku":"25440369363847025795","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50064562651384,"sku":"27165860620867350738","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50064562684152,"sku":"19934438782949173017","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50064562716920,"sku":"15485644298473766090","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50064562749688,"sku":"25347754097283193030","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/3646929084253181273_2048.jpg?v=1786872116"},{"product_id":"i-have-nothing-to-say","title":"I have nothing to say.","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThis shirt says \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-918912f4-7fff-60cf-83bd-7848a6ad7a13\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 11pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: bold; font-variant: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eI have nothing to say.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12pt; font-family: Roboto,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe said it anyway.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan id=\"docs-internal-guid-d102e40c-7fff-e583-e7fb-40f2d5b1144e\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" style=\"line-height: 1.38; margin-top: 12pt; margin-bottom: 12pt;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 13pt; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50083612786936,"sku":"92648916470214482231","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50083612819704,"sku":"16714895222626337462","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50083612852472,"sku":"23516514684577551270","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50083612885240,"sku":"31453433257848899350","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50083612918008,"sku":"15016100353524257970","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50083612950776,"sku":"89274288220836736654","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50083612983544,"sku":"24159924705764446434","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50083613016312,"sku":"62446227685070568999","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50083613049080,"sku":"30400322616000228115","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50083613081848,"sku":"33540545854459746182","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50083613114616,"sku":"16372418258881686751","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50083613147384,"sku":"19192490924671782509","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50083613180152,"sku":"31389927008163516941","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50083613212920,"sku":"33959144328711106589","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50083613245688,"sku":"16073338398107824640","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50083613278456,"sku":"30665778957245802579","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50083613311224,"sku":"32272564747956890842","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50083613343992,"sku":"11155111022794066549","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50083613376760,"sku":"16054965846666006759","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50083613409528,"sku":"20374445520119730019","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50083613442296,"sku":"62149721153445961404","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/1363052706232641123_2048.jpg?v=1786873950"},{"product_id":"im-fine-1","title":"i'm fine.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003e i'm fine.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe is not. He has decided this is fine.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50124058820856,"sku":"11248938126700263074","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50124058853624,"sku":"16397365798908534772","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50124058886392,"sku":"24379715813114551860","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50124058951928,"sku":"29900994179851919680","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50124058984696,"sku":"23007659759053266740","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124059017464,"sku":"10926354317580104807","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124059050232,"sku":"13875666457831702170","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124059083000,"sku":"11370665557433344147","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124059115768,"sku":"16003366534091859421","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/2659223302962088867_2048.jpg?v=1788501272"},{"product_id":"dont-ask-me-anything-1","title":"Don't ask me anything.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eDon't ask me anything.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe will still tell you.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50124061868280,"sku":"21701312220644988141","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50124061901048,"sku":"59353451762098602349","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50124061933816,"sku":"26657137041352454912","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50124061999352,"sku":"10552421706141182551","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50124062032120,"sku":"57590621042309975042","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124062064888,"sku":"24092257304985220017","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124062097656,"sku":"12311170909947550675","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124062130424,"sku":"22271778167442128097","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124062163192,"sku":"31580207963650384031","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/7683531080310219899_2048.jpg?v=1788501914"},{"product_id":"triggered-but-polite-1","title":"Triggered, but polite.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eTriggered, but polite.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe will address it calmly, later, never.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50124062228728,"sku":"19471797732591425522","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50124062261496,"sku":"22354540373636134742","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50124062294264,"sku":"10407397610110386450","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50124062359800,"sku":"14986211906623648871","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50124062392568,"sku":"14289633826541701508","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124062425336,"sku":"73879181109499999306","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124062458104,"sku":"12289122641208019204","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124062490872,"sku":"15609892872583704321","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124062523640,"sku":"19172680313040151881","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/2493883607407528971_2048.jpg?v=1788501987"},{"product_id":"how-are-you-dont-1","title":"How are you? Don't.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eHow are you? Don't.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIt was never really a question.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50124062949624,"sku":"15691100099856444037","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50124062982392,"sku":"81806873643151625642","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50124063015160,"sku":"17273464374832354282","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Bone","offer_id":50124063047928,"sku":"20208360614363919919","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50124063080696,"sku":"24451654179686680703","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50124063113464,"sku":"91051768722425235404","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124063146232,"sku":"19174516157959330574","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124063179000,"sku":"18300174802485974364","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124063211768,"sku":"10115217070612745494","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124063244536,"sku":"19349230957739814078","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/9089447344818820090_2048.jpg?v=1788502136"},{"product_id":"i-made-eye-contact-once-1","title":"I made eye contact once.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI made eye contact once.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIt has not been repeated on purpose.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50124064129272,"sku":"21018888129800603052","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50124064162040,"sku":"15423226810292255815","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50124064194808,"sku":"19369452807699612428","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Bone","offer_id":50124064227576,"sku":"12489578716420817741","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50124064260344,"sku":"32216548156170980366","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50124064293112,"sku":"16862670834871717533","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124064325880,"sku":"13311025780575165327","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124064358648,"sku":"24467143259457005394","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50124064391416,"sku":"98682408030065355815","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50124064424184,"sku":"15667391321747184453","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/3137405619764820134_2048.jpg?v=1788502368"},{"product_id":"i-have-nothing-to-say-1","title":"I have nothing to say.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI have nothing to say.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe said it anyway.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50161062084856,"sku":"21735803960688606987","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50161062117624,"sku":"16396548162680686651","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50161062150392,"sku":"74102503907392795682","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50161062183160,"sku":"12977244902671092149","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50161062215928,"sku":"19317347349639763560","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161062248696,"sku":"86490740489612104413","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161062281464,"sku":"11139628836936407594","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161062314232,"sku":"31175629374752368609","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161062347000,"sku":"28365945828430366775","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/142872212299014484_2048.jpg?v=1788502678"},{"product_id":"i-read-the-room-and-stayed-1","title":"I read the room and stayed.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI read the room and stayed.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eOn purpose. Every time.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50161065853176,"sku":"18797093118091985238","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50161065885944,"sku":"23149854714651866569","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50161065918712,"sku":"32283103485133195901","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50161065951480,"sku":"23075589687390648816","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50161065984248,"sku":"68924842045893981039","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161066017016,"sku":"18140415004595729212","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161066049784,"sku":"26254442970678810470","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161066082552,"sku":"18029416013637797651","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161066115320,"sku":"29553608951361719251","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/3752170599829842902_2048.jpg?v=1788503371"},{"product_id":"five-alarms-deep-1","title":"Five alarms deep.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eFive alarms deep.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eThe first four were optimistic.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50161066541304,"sku":"26880298097248291510","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50161066574072,"sku":"31247831399494663483","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50161066606840,"sku":"10151393597534205236","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50161066639608,"sku":"50512218763158820723","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50161066672376,"sku":"10568442522485386952","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161066705144,"sku":"39509136736875855514","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161066737912,"sku":"11329164074229638395","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161066770680,"sku":"19323927168222191062","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161066803448,"sku":"27645256615110242591","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/1827988460097393966_2048.jpg?v=1788503510"},{"product_id":"i-replied-in-my-head-1","title":"I replied in my head.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI replied in my head.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eThe real reply. The good one.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50161068409080,"sku":"80743279794438662253","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50161068441848,"sku":"28463171719621137947","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50161068474616,"sku":"73301746793298157330","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50161068507384,"sku":"78644836374262739829","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50161068540152,"sku":"29412311770985999937","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161068572920,"sku":"32357951501542311259","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161068605688,"sku":"20391445054343460030","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161068638456,"sku":"19430972129978259306","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161068671224,"sku":"99907174761206595273","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/8841408724828785443_2048.jpg?v=1788503810"},{"product_id":"sorry-in-advance-1","title":"Sorry in advance.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eSorry in advance.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eFor what, specifically, he will not say.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50161068736760,"sku":"33380567510662052332","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50161068769528,"sku":"22897945350838844962","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50161068802296,"sku":"92106881941387444176","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50161068835064,"sku":"79292978766986719331","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50161068867832,"sku":"22341031899402064234","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161068900600,"sku":"19997103046917978139","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161068933368,"sku":"73844366955421682634","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50161068966136,"sku":"22981303418786649807","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50161068998904,"sku":"10866171100826330175","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/8871157391992517548_2048.jpg?v=1788503881"},{"product_id":"i-said-i-was-sick-i-wasnt-1","title":"I said I was sick. I wasn't.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI said I was sick. I wasn't.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe commits to a story once told.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166136766712,"sku":"29866680228970028621","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50166136799480,"sku":"29886933307242491734","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166136832248,"sku":"12744905619437855391","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166136865016,"sku":"14955542635903676985","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50166136897784,"sku":"12283815086766365928","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166136930552,"sku":"23330981854161974350","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166136963320,"sku":"34710486342654312177","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166136996088,"sku":"68339029412004552021","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137028856,"sku":"30759137690935889525","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/7104631343404728231_2048.jpg?v=1788504506"},{"product_id":"i-sat-near-the-door-1","title":"I sat near the door.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI sat near the door.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIn case the day required an exit.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166137127160,"sku":"19168037587533387086","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137159928,"sku":"24995282938008398250","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166137192696,"sku":"32101806089016675547","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166137225464,"sku":"35170486758607697960","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137258232,"sku":"18639402262372320063","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166137291000,"sku":"21393881819011274282","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137323768,"sku":"78250088287909227494","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166137356536,"sku":"94621322135494012924","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137389304,"sku":"30427608191938523161","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/645851187059887222_2048.jpg?v=1788504582"},{"product_id":"my-family-stopped-asking-1","title":"My family stopped asking.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eMy family stopped asking.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIt was a mutual decision, eventually.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166137487608,"sku":"34245840282531189292","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137520376,"sku":"16415166030341131746","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166137553144,"sku":"10199519728510408760","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166137585912,"sku":"95877873434070752439","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137618680,"sku":"20452374439677266533","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166137651448,"sku":"12044669221016793812","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137684216,"sku":"95078434843618280796","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166137716984,"sku":"23116786379766725936","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166137749752,"sku":"16717959533091468158","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/2768759124117333134_2048.jpg?v=1788504665"},{"product_id":"was-today-really-necessary-1","title":"Was today really necessary?","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eWas today really necessary?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIt was. He is still asking.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166138142968,"sku":"14954539509950453439","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138175736,"sku":"89307517302813395074","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166138208504,"sku":"14142862374685993606","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166138241272,"sku":"36921714556035253068","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138274040,"sku":"21814910922246781030","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166138306808,"sku":"32407441332615618769","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138339576,"sku":"21211656693909305169","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166138372344,"sku":"21327519168496319664","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138405112,"sku":"21984998248670165478","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/1898288445179416703_2048.jpg?v=1788504810"},{"product_id":"i-ate-before-i-came-1","title":"I ate before I came.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI ate before I came.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe shows up fed, every time, on principle.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166138536184,"sku":"26619508525188936458","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138568952,"sku":"26209152861121149478","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166138601720,"sku":"32521090821957110281","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166138634488,"sku":"17047212657750551667","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138667256,"sku":"18732950216081214040","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166138700024,"sku":"14844002049547290430","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138732792,"sku":"31593623396479317530","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166138765560,"sku":"33637186304282399298","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138798328,"sku":"15413292458021595939","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/2447138703781735765_2048.jpg?v=1788504885"},{"product_id":"i-dont-like-the-beach-1","title":"I don't like the beach.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI don't like the beach.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eThe sand remembers everything. He does too.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166138863864,"sku":"37887607026343613439","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138896632,"sku":"27936610990748182482","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166138929400,"sku":"12617337237574294176","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166138962168,"sku":"16392736696555565084","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50166138994936,"sku":"16457623242438022383","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166139027704,"sku":"27080250505623314417","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166139060472,"sku":"92859919987753709164","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166139093240,"sku":"30028351655369700180","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166139126008,"sku":"18024486848514397408","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/9462739653886718352_2048.jpg?v=1788504956"},{"product_id":"i-dont-say-it-out-loud-1","title":"I don't say it out loud.","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis hoodie says \u003cstrong\u003eI don't say it out loud.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eThat part stays his.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe hoodie itself is genuinely good: heavyweight cotton fleece, soft inside, holds its shape. Lined hood, metal eyelets, regular fit.\u003cbr\u003eTear-away label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eBlack with white text, or bone with black text. Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166139912440,"sku":"17019130811825624098","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Bone","offer_id":50166139945208,"sku":"26884368055606009362","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166139977976,"sku":"25465973693436180593","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166140010744,"sku":"18587729257187301671","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Bone","offer_id":50166140043512,"sku":"18305633484981557212","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166140076280,"sku":"12618454384832672590","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166140109048,"sku":"33556731449440481362","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166140141816,"sku":"11569728248069173293","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Bone","offer_id":50166140174584,"sku":"20684659482934594346","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/6070977449659288197_2048.jpg?v=1788505181"},{"product_id":"i-dont-say-it-out-loud","title":"I don't say it out loud.","description":"This shirt says \u003cstrong\u003eI don't say it out loud.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eThat part stays his.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003cbr\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50166160916728,"sku":"15445087105069464039","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50166160949496,"sku":"31777348284826066930","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50166160982264,"sku":"29941469987648194068","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166161015032,"sku":"16221089935441346639","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50166161047800,"sku":"33028583715226397001","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50166161080568,"sku":"13729191054234243733","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166161113336,"sku":"13344998453866170194","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50166161146104,"sku":"28177606393489347369","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50166161178872,"sku":"26283993434598596806","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166161211640,"sku":"20795634816228344206","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50166161244408,"sku":"18358333232079140726","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50166161277176,"sku":"31287869927037860141","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166161309944,"sku":"18251208053480105455","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166161342712,"sku":"17147252913361791229","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50166161375480,"sku":"12440392162710347631","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166161408248,"sku":"31309858655911427941","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166161441016,"sku":"12767750998063657741","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50166161473784,"sku":"24409323431361201927","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166161506552,"sku":"97938688706455634071","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166161539320,"sku":"28226791595417045956","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50166161572088,"sku":"11137722084685125808","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/11611006600215380330_2048.jpg?v=1786780645"},{"product_id":"i-said-i-was-sick-i-wasnt","title":"I said I was sick. I wasn't.","description":"This shirt says \u003cstrong\u003eI said I was sick. I wasn't.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe commits to a story once told.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003cbr\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50166162686200,"sku":"24554216901348706968","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50166162718968,"sku":"49733235119198738488","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50166162751736,"sku":"22517896417440582452","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166162784504,"sku":"13657114649410890915","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50166162817272,"sku":"33434123030314729512","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50166162850040,"sku":"25699603342760695128","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166162882808,"sku":"25032417555005274898","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50166162915576,"sku":"15911211787925688151","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50166162948344,"sku":"78835264359190776467","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166162981112,"sku":"32131760170014693606","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163013880,"sku":"75319357151022784235","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50166163046648,"sku":"30271610747861572693","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166163079416,"sku":"26769540557787075147","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163112184,"sku":"18186753986825371977","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50166163144952,"sku":"31400336781377526331","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166163177720,"sku":"38306749596692167180","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163210488,"sku":"29621646758918278266","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50166163243256,"sku":"20328900973129390251","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166163276024,"sku":"26894010408504707548","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163308792,"sku":"20159913876296748845","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50166163341560,"sku":"13571642375358328801","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/5187986630076830993_2048.jpg?v=1786780651"},{"product_id":"i-sat-near-the-door","title":"I sat near the door.","description":"This shirt says \u003cstrong\u003eI sat near the door.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIn case the day required an exit.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003cbr\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50166163570936,"sku":"22853123786040958634","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163603704,"sku":"32329511399562537494","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50166163636472,"sku":"23119265666743932919","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166163669240,"sku":"27155802965854834520","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163702008,"sku":"16030584216460663853","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50166163734776,"sku":"33186027975821847587","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166163767544,"sku":"20792790079936424783","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163800312,"sku":"52261063669318063748","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50166163833080,"sku":"24262718998904042684","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166163865848,"sku":"16389181442157109022","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163898616,"sku":"30789842470015109842","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50166163931384,"sku":"20535029896244583072","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166163964152,"sku":"23039775517164559226","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166163996920,"sku":"12836207868445121254","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50166164029688,"sku":"52099399311527684522","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166164062456,"sku":"21374518736442930959","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166164095224,"sku":"77863608930588107740","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50166164127992,"sku":"32878344505937594195","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166164160760,"sku":"14366429489628309109","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166164193528,"sku":"24437487320911021854","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50166164226296,"sku":"10761590416032227621","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/16450673266828230200_2048.jpg?v=1786780654"},{"product_id":"was-today-really-necessary","title":"Was today really necessary?","description":"This shirt says \u003cstrong\u003eWas today really necessary?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIt was. He is still asking.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003cbr\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50166164455672,"sku":"21436530663939561567","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50166164488440,"sku":"27986513529655978368","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50166164521208,"sku":"26408824776075766370","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166164553976,"sku":"16492300933426773604","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50166164586744,"sku":"18090817125081995388","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50166164619512,"sku":"62372931360114247988","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166164652280,"sku":"32195653678809674043","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50166164685048,"sku":"16245711229950584864","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50166164717816,"sku":"16097781709179868813","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166164750584,"sku":"64532253942819903416","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50166164783352,"sku":"32856642958150587547","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50166164816120,"sku":"75756747885008066620","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166164848888,"sku":"16490307754273661195","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166164881656,"sku":"19565510661890924606","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50166164914424,"sku":"15977546082399961103","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166164947192,"sku":"10339056884536651660","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166164979960,"sku":"29977914429636697781","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50166165012728,"sku":"43501120919586949141","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166165045496,"sku":"18163576330707770593","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166165078264,"sku":"17517400376382355164","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50166165111032,"sku":"62490437956209451352","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/7256633624717568073_2048.jpg?v=1786780657"},{"product_id":"i-ate-before-i-came","title":"I ate before I came.","description":"This shirt says \u003cstrong\u003eI ate before I came.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eHe shows up fed, every time, on principle.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003cbr\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50166165340408,"sku":"14735086138060256162","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50166165373176,"sku":"28662309833755845248","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50166165405944,"sku":"34314038364556885740","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166165438712,"sku":"25911551874975794381","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50166165471480,"sku":"33132828507463802756","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50166165504248,"sku":"20833083010722038005","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166165537016,"sku":"17826092955585138905","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50166165569784,"sku":"93956781075082271129","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50166165602552,"sku":"60842078890343846882","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166165635320,"sku":"17175356812513611801","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50166165668088,"sku":"12828018858073983133","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50166165700856,"sku":"87443857873106709704","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166165733624,"sku":"62465222647108278775","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166165766392,"sku":"61838395419295308227","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50166165799160,"sku":"24148254390044836945","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166165831928,"sku":"30096328230011546592","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166165864696,"sku":"17402460782484566689","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50166165897464,"sku":"30591183044498457265","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166165930232,"sku":"20150686930077780724","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166165963000,"sku":"30945340196591304404","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50166165995768,"sku":"21757763100825774947","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/5394497028662268416_2048.jpg?v=1786780659"},{"product_id":"i-dont-like-the-beach","title":"I don't like the beach.","description":"This shirt says \u003cstrong\u003eI don't like the beach.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eThe sand remembers everything. He does too.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003cbr\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50166166520056,"sku":"30557111466529878019","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50166166552824,"sku":"24009952366960889497","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50166166585592,"sku":"25012112510699463058","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166166618360,"sku":"45865556656404531653","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50166166651128,"sku":"17241572581464782199","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50166166683896,"sku":"26419001652428704478","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166166716664,"sku":"21398639303317212531","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50166166749432,"sku":"31933861088459384410","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50166166782200,"sku":"54814676739911630234","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166166814968,"sku":"14588598743163154160","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50166166847736,"sku":"30697327191705206933","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50166166880504,"sku":"12127847568068840225","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166166913272,"sku":"14822490174290834036","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166166946040,"sku":"33322825583172741894","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50166166978808,"sku":"25964319758596210030","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166167011576,"sku":"11534901742819298861","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166167044344,"sku":"90040072917311827074","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50166167077112,"sku":"25096299980732961538","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166167109880,"sku":"39481918460179886740","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166167142648,"sku":"21744531194324944845","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50166167175416,"sku":"71495570062887595356","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/10894204086673251902_2048.jpg?v=1786780662"},{"product_id":"my-family-stopped-asking","title":"My family stopped asking.","description":"This shirt says \u003cstrong\u003eMy family stopped asking.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat's it. That's the design.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family:'Courier New',Courier,monospace;font-weight:700;font-size:1.15em;font-style:italic;\"\u003eIt was a mutual decision, eventually.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe shirt itself is genuinely good: 100% Airlume combed cotton, lightweight and soft. Unisex retail fit, holds its shape.\u003cbr\u003ePrinted neck label, nothing itches.\u003cbr\u003eEthically made, no sweatshops.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack, white, or gray. Obviously.","brand":"whateverrr.","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":50166167437560,"sku":"27199287725853234906","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Gray","offer_id":50166167470328,"sku":"26276361296233541296","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":50166167503096,"sku":"18572393920956748098","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50166167535864,"sku":"31099555025371548719","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Gray","offer_id":50166167568632,"sku":"67561197437632938875","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":50166167601400,"sku":"80548276867537155146","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50166167634168,"sku":"27355690412129333585","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Gray","offer_id":50166167666936,"sku":"43346547995463001215","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":50166167699704,"sku":"26653521777546075990","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50166167732472,"sku":"18280845248178781663","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Gray","offer_id":50166167765240,"sku":"25369089345185979532","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":50166167798008,"sku":"73336017738199170392","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166167830776,"sku":"21725471936342343777","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166167863544,"sku":"19227075308626940481","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":50166167896312,"sku":"94458006959891624610","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166167929080,"sku":"37569296651640388491","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166167961848,"sku":"19434144335718071541","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":50166167994616,"sku":"32723945951138996747","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50166168027384,"sku":"12956685235606105031","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Gray","offer_id":50166168060152,"sku":"30629443129529611758","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":50166168092920,"sku":"25115975570107172282","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0841\/3800\/0632\/files\/7889360594148879877_2048.jpg?v=1786780665"}],"url":"https:\/\/whateverrr.shop\/collections\/leave-me-alone.oembed?page=2","provider":"whateverrr.","version":"1.0","type":"link"}